♥ Laws Of Life ♥

1)Law Of Telephone: When You Dial A Wrong Number, You Never Get A Busy Tone.

2)Law Of Mechanical Repair: After Your Hands Become Coated With Grease Your Nose Will Begin To Itch.

3)Law Of The Workshop: Any Tool, When Dropped, Will Roll To The Least Accessible Corner.

4)Law Of The Alibi: If You Tell The Boss You Were Late For Work Because You Had A Flat Tire, The Next Morning You Will Have A Flat Tire.

5)Bath Theorem: When The Body Is Immersed In Water, The Telephone Rings.

6) Law Of Encounters: The Probability Of Meeting Someone You Know Increases When You Are With Someone You Don’t Want To Be Seen With.

7) Law Of The Result: When You Try To Prove To Someone That A Machine Won’t Work, It Will.

8) Law Of Bio mechanics: The Severity Of The Itch Is Inversely Proportional To The Reach.

9) Theater Rule: People With The Seats At The Furthest From The Aisle Arrive Last.

10) Law Of Coffee: As Soon As You Sit Down For A Cup Of Hot Coffee, Your Boss Will Ask You To Do Something Which Will Last Until The Coffee Is Cold.

11) Law Of Proposal : After U Accept A Proposal You Will Get A Better One

(Did you know “A joke a day keeps the doctor away”? Unless he happens to be your fun-Doctor, in which case enhanced empathy with him is the outcome!)

Lawyer- Before the death certificate was signed, had you taken the pulse ?

Pathologist- No.

Lawyer- Did you listen to the heart ?

Pathologist – No.

Lawyer- Did you check for breathing ?

Pathologist – No.

Lawyer – So, when the death certificate was signed you weren’t actually sure he was dead, were you ?

Pathologist – Well, let me put it this way. The man’s brain was sitting in a jar on my desk. But I guess it’s possible he could be out there practicing law somewhere.

(Did you know “A joke a day keeps the doctor away”? Unless he happens to be your fun-Doctor, in which case enhanced empathy with him is the outcome!)

Laaloo sent his BioData 2 apply 4 a post in Microsoft USA.

Few days later he got this reply :

Dear Mr. Laloo Prasad,
You do not meet our requirement.
Please do not send any further correspondence.
No phone call will be entertained.

Thanks
Bill Gates
.

(Did you know “A joke a day keeps the doctor away”? Unless he happens to be your fun-Doctor, in which case enhanced empathy with him is the outcome!)

There was once a man who had pain in his elbow. When he went to the doctor, he was greeted by a large computer that said “urine sample, please!”

The man who had the urine sample with him handed it to the computer, which immediately responded “tennis elbow, collect your prescription please & check back in a week!”

(Did you know “A joke a day keeps the doctor away”? Unless he happens to be your fun-Doctor, in which case enhanced empathy with him is the outcome!)

The patient went to his doctor for a checkup, and the doctor wrote out a prescription for him in his usual illegible writing.

The patient put it in his pocket, but he forgot to have it filled.

Every morning for two years, he showed it to the conductor as a railroad pass. Twice, it got him into the movies, once into the baseball park, and once into the symphony. He got a raise at work by showing it as a note from the boss.

One day, he mislaid it. His daughter picked it up, played it on the piano, and won a scholarship to a conservatory of music!!!

(Did you know “A joke a day keeps the doctor away”? Unless he happens to be your fun-Doctor, in which case enhanced empathy with him is the outcome!)

ISE KAHTEY HAIN : Dil Tera Deewana Hai Sanam !!!

(In the GenNext Aashiqui style)

Girl calls a boy:
..
Girl: Hello baby
Boy: Ohh janu bolo
Girl: Kahan ho yar, subah se koi aata pata nahi ..!
Boy: Are hum to khoye hue hain aapki aankhon me..
Girl: Abhi kya kar rahe ho……..??
Boy: Tumhari pic dekh raha hun, kahin aur man hi nahi lag raha..
Girl: Maine to tumhe koi pic di hi nahi ..!!
Boy: Are mere dil me chhapi hai barson se..
Girl: But hum to parson hi mile hain…!!
Boy: Tumhare bina har ek pal barson jaisa hai Pinky….
Girl: Pinky…?? Ye Pinky kaun hai..?? main to RUHI hun
Boy: Tumse baat karke mai to sab bhool jata hun..
Girl: Tum Rocky ho na….??
Boy: Gharwale to Vicky bulate hain, lekin wo galat ho sakte hain tum nahi..
Girl: Ye 09100xxxxxxxx hai na….??
Boy: Ab tak nahi tha par ab se yehi hai….